According to Yahoo!News,
The Forest Service is fighting a new wave of aggressive mountain goats with shouts and the occasional paintball gun. I only post this because I have a long history of goat attacks. Here are a few:
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| This goat got most of my candy corn. | | | | | |
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| Goat pictured above washed my windshield, then would not leave until I gave her a dollar. She ate it. | | | | | | |
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| More goat panhandlers. |
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| Goats loitering. I called the police, but they just told the goats to move along. The goats declined. |
It's about time someone did something about the level of goat aggression in this country. Tell your friends about the dangers of goats, and take precautions yourself. Don't be a statistic.
*No goats were harmed in the writing of this article.
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